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Who Pays For What?
10 Tips For Financing An Encore Wedding
Getting remarried? Well, I have good news and bad news. Which would you like first? OK. The bad news: Your parents are not obligated to finance your second wedding. When it comes to encore weddings, the buck stops here. But don't panic because the goods news is: There is hope!
First, let's do the math. An informal ceremony for 75 guests with a sit-down dinner at an upscale hotel, your ring of, say, half carat or more, a fabulous designer wedding dress, fancy cake, exotic flowers and a resort honeymoon can easily add up to between $15,000 and $20,000 or more. If that number has you gasping for breath, allow me to share some simple secrets for substantially cutting down those skyrocketing costs.
First of all, if your parents or in-laws offer to assist you financially, by all means happily and graciously accept. Just keep in mind that this will entitle them to some input as well as a portion of the invite list. Next, discuss and decide upon a budget with your fiancé. Agree upon it and stick to it.
Now it's time to get creative! Here are 10 ways to help you save your hard-earned dollars while still creating the encore wedding of your dreams:
- The Date
Hold your ceremony and reception on an off-peak day. Consider a Thursday or Friday night, or a Sunday afternoon, rather than a Saturday night affair.
- The Site
Rather than the usual reception locales, take a look at a nearby bed & breakfast, small chapel, private home, garden or historical site.
- Type of Reception
Consider a brunch buffet, a light luncheon, mid-afternoon cake with coffee and champagne, or a late evening dessert with specialty coffees in place of a fancy sit-down dinner.
- Your Wedding Dress
Save a fortune on your gown by selecting a vintage, special occasion or designer knock-off dress. Other options include retail outlets, resale, rentals or even bridesmaid dresses in ivory.
- Rings
Forgo the extravagance of a solitaire and consider simple wedding bands of gold, platinum or titanium.
- Flowers
Select flowers that are in season and utilize the floral department in your local grocery store.
- The "Extras"
Skip the throwaway bouquet, garter, party favors and fancy guest book. These little items quickly add up.
- The Cake
Pass on the towering bakery wedding cake and order one from your local supermarket or favorite restaurant.
- Music
Hire a single instrumentalist for the ceremony and hire a DJ in lieu of a band.
- The Honeymoon
Don't set your sites on any one specific location or set of dates. Be flexible. Look for special offers. Sometimes you can fly to Europe cheaper than you can fly to your closest resort. You may also consider shortening your trip by just a day or two or think about honeymooning at a nearby bed & breakfast. Remember, it's not the place but the time spent alone together, taking those first few days of wedding bliss and making them last a lifetime.
Write to Beth at secondweddings@weddingchannel.com with your questions about planning an encore wedding.
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Beth Reed Ramirez, creator of Bride Again magazine (1998-2002) and editor of the new on-line version at www.brideagain.com, became a "bride again" when she remarried in 1996. Her own encore wedding took place on the 18th hole of a private country club and included her daughter and two stepchildren in the ceremony.
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